TV the Babysitter

Of late, our dear beloved and hated friend, TV, has been babysitting Sam. It seems that TV is better at it than me. TV can keep Sam occupied for an hour and a half (if I let TV stay that long) while I sometimes have trouble keeping Sam occupied and happy for 20 minutes! Sam loves TV. He goes crazy when he sees TV and I can't seem to tell TV to go to hell. What am I doing to my child? I choose the movies/programs that TV shows Sam (mostly SHREK and SKREK 2), but I still feel guilty. Then I rationalize TV by telling myself that TV was my best friend for 2-3 hours a day as a child and I turned out ok, right? Sam doesn't spend that much time with TV...I call my girlfriends (in other states even) and rationalize to them...still I feel guilty about allowing TV to spend so much time with Sam, yet the next day, there is TV calling to Sam (and to me!). HELP! Have I collapsed and given in to our cold and unfeeling society allowing objects and flickering lights and sounds to raise my child? Is Sam not using words because of TV (even though his sign language is amazing)? Am I a terrible mother for allowing TV, everybody's "kid next door", to come over and play?

As Sam grows I am continually amazed at what Sam can do and what he chooses to do. Some of which includes:
~Signing so many words that we can easily have a conversation and he can effectively communicate his needs and desires.
~Flushing the toilet 8 times in a 15 minute shower because he loves watching the water spin down the drain.
~Sticking his head in the toilet and singing so he can hear the difference in his voice.
~Giving closed mouth kisses (finally!).
~Sleeping all night, waking, nursing, playing and within an hour seem as tired as he does at the end of the day.
~Driving his little matchbox cars over everything in sight including, chairs, the dog, the toilet seat (do you see the recent obsession with the toilet?), himself and, of course, mom and dad, all while making a little "Brrrrmmmm" car sound.
~Running so fast he falls down laughing, then getting up and doing it all over again, and again and again.
~Loving his books and wanting to read them all the time with us or without us.
~Eating constantly! If he is awake he is eating.
~Climbing the numerous stairs all around and in and out of our home (and driving cars on them).
~Watching the movie Shrek everyday, if we let him.
~Singing in the bathtub and dancing to almost any song.
~Crying in sympathy when another kiddo cries.
~Squealing for joy when his daddy comes home from work.
~Thanks Tara, for this great idea!

Acupuncture

Last week I had acupuncture for the first time ever in my life! It was amazing! I felt so calm and collected after it was all done and no pain... I started having this weird cough whenever I bent over (like when picking up toys or weeding a flower bed) after I gave birth to Sam. The Dr.s in KS said it was an allergy and gave me an inhaler that never worked...so I have been exploring other options. It turns out I stretched my upper esophogial sphincter while pregnant and now it can't close properly to keep my stomach acid in when I bend over! WEIRD! There are little things I can do...like not eating after 7 pm, avoiding spicy food and alcohol, sleeping with a propped head and chest...and I am taking some chinese herbs along with acupuncture...it seems to be helping. I also cut out sugar from my diet. So far so good...

Night Weaned

Well, we are finally completely night weaned! It feels great! There was very little resistance from Sam and I don't feel used anymore...it was a win-win decision. Sam is also sleeping much better at night...waking only once, but more commonly not at all! I love it...and there was no "crying-it-out". I am so proud of myself for sticking to my belief in AP parenting. Sam nurses now once first thing in the morning and once after his nap. That is it. I am happy with these nursings and think that perhaps I may let him wean himself from here. We'll see how the upcoming months progress...

Busy

I am finally feeling as if I have a routine that fits with my life here. We have a new playgroup I created (trying to recreate the AP group from KS), yoga and pilates classes, a hiking mom's group I will start this week...it is nice. Along with this routine comes a busy day after another busy day...today we were so busy Sam didn't nap at all and hopefully will sleep okay tonight. I am also volunteering for the Farmer's Market Organizational group and have some busier times with that! Matt's mom and dad are visiting this weekend and I am trying to get a few things done before they arrive. I am very excited to see them, even if it means I feel compelled to clean a little more! I miss my Kansas women!!! I want to scream that from a window...it is a big ache in heart.

Sign Language and Other Stuff

In the last week Sam's signing vocabulary has grown! He now knows: "milk", "all done", "bye-bye/hi", "hot", "light", "please", "dog", "banana", "I want" and we invented a sign for "popsicle"! He creates sentences now with 2-3 signs in a row! It is amazing! He is trying to form spoken words, but we are just now getting to a point where we are communicating so freely...words aren't always needed. He still talks though! It is never quiet in this house. I have been missing my Kansas women so incredibly lately...and Sam has been missing his pals...we've been too reclusive. So, I decided since I have not found the playgroup I want, I am going to create one! I invited a large group of women and babes for a playgroup on Wednesday and I hope to create a regular weekly playgroup. A few of the moms I spoke with today seemed really into it, so things are looking good. While on vacation in Maine I decided I needed to become involved with something in the community that was not parenting related...so I am going to begin volunteering for the Farmer's Market Organization group. There is a fund raising event this Friday called the Cornucopia Gala and I will help decorate the winery (with Sam on my back!). Then on Friday evening, Matt and I will attend the event! I can't wait! I am so excited to meet some new people and help out our Farmer's Market! P.S. The weaning is going well.

Weaning

A few years ago I visited a very close girlfriend of mine in Colorado. She had just weaned her 18 month old son and was rearing to go out with me and live it up for a night. I remember thinking about weaning and nursing and how it all seemed so far away from me then. That was in June of 2002...here we are just over 3 years later and I am in the middle of weaning. I firmly believe in respecting the needs of your children and honoring the ever-important parent-child attachment bond. I never thought I would actively wean Sam. I imagined him weaning himself in this beautiful, idyllic fantasy. Of course, that was all before the months of nipple twisting and public boobie snuggling. There was no public boobie snuggling in my fantasy! So here we are actively weaning. Matt has been great. He puts Sam to sleep at night with no fuss from Sam and he has been taking night wakings successfully too! So where does this leave me? I feel as though I am not needed in that department anymore...a good feeling and a hollow feeling. I feel like I am being used for my boobies, not the milk, the boobies! Ugh. I can comfort Sam to sleep with little songs and gentle touches... I miss nursing even though we are not completely weaned, I miss the long nursings where Sam would take in the fantastic milk that all of us mothers make; where I would feel the let down and the rush of Prolactin after...I miss that. I haven't had that with Sam for a long time. I know it is time to wean. I look forward to being done. I can't wait to comfort Sam with only little songs and gentle touches...no boobie snuggling.